Thrive Life: Values (Part 5)

Values are beliefs that you feel are important in the way you live your life, the way you work, and in the way you act. When your beliefs match up with your actions, your life flows, you feel grounded and abundance comes. When there is a gap, most will feel “lost” or feel life is “chaotic.”

Values in our THRIVE life serve many important purposes. Values help us to set goals by establishing our priorities. If my top five values are God, Spouse, Children, Health and Service, then my goals will be born from these Values. My day will reflect actions that support these priorities. Our Values help serve as a gauge for our life at any given moment in time. How do we feel about our life? Are we fulfilled? Are we doing what makes us happy? Am I grounded? Am I feeling scattered or overwhelmed? An answer of yes or no to these questions will indicate if you have strayed from your value system.

A good example is when we feel overwhelmed. Usually, when feeling overwhelmed, if we look at our activities and compare them to our Values, there’s a gap: our actions are not in full support of our Values. Usually, someone else’s Values have snuck in! Maybe those of your spouse, partner, friend, parent, child, or maybe a foundation you support. By setting our goals (driven by our Values) and implementing the action steps for supporting those goals, our Values serve as directions for our daily living. If we know our Values and live by them, then our behaviors and actions will lead us towards choices which lead to a more fulfilling life.

In our society today, we have become easily distracted human beings. It’s easy for us to fall into the trap of living by different Values daily if we don’t have them clearly defined. Example: you say that health is a Value (therefore a priority), but yet your nutrition and your exercise is a day-by-day event. You do your best to “fit it in” but with no great focus or determination.

Our time is so important and, honestly, time is of the essence which makes needing clearly defined Values so important. We can’t get yesterday back so why not live each day by a way that serves us best?

Values tell us A LOT about ourselves. A person who has Peace in their top five Values and Success in their bottom five is very different from a person who has Success in their top 5 and in their bottom 5 Values. It shows YOU what’s important to you. What is important to me may be very different from what is important to you. And that is OK! Think about knowing this in your relationships. If you are in a relationship now, do you both have similar Values or are they completely different? Do you know? Do you know your children’s Values? Maybe knowing their Values could explain their actions and their daily behaviors.

In closing, our Values change. And that’s okay. I go through my own Values assessment every 3 months and ask everyone in my family to do the same!

How to identify your Values and include them in your THRIVE life:

Nutrition and Exercise

Your body is your temple. Our health should always be our number one priority. Eat well, exercise often and love deep!

Identify your Values.

First, ask yourself, “What is truly important to me?” and then write it down. The goal is to extract the Value out of the sentence.

For example:
I want to get married and have three kids (Family)
I want to serve the Lord (God)
I want to go on five trips a year (Adventure)
I want to volunteer monthly (Service)
There are hundreds of values! Just google ‘values list’ and start there!!

Then, pick your most important 20.

Next: Prioritize the 20. Start with 1 and go from there. If you get to a point where you struggle with two that are very close in priority but you don’t know if one should be a 15 and one should be a 20, then ask yourself a scenario using the two values. For example: you want success and you want adventure, then here are some questions to ask yourself:

If I’m successful than I can go on lots of trips each year (maybe success is coming in higher here). If I am working a lot than I won’t get to go on many trips and the thought of that is not making me happy (adventure is coming in slightly higher here).
If I’m successful than maybe I can structure my schedule to work in such a way where I can grab more time off than what I think is possible and go on 3 trips a year versus 5. Then, I will plan to increase the number of trips in a couple of years to move it upwards to 4 trips and then up even more to 5 trips (Success is clearly becoming a priority over Adventure).

Look at your list. Now take an inventory of your life. Explore if your Values match up with your actions, behaviors and beliefs. Your Values are your guidance system! Are you going where you want to go? Your Values list change so it’s important for you to keep in touch with your Values a few times a year. Revisit your list and take your inventory of your life. Especially if you start to feel unbalanced!!!

Much love,


Jennifer Zelop

Jennifer Zelop

Experiencing a major life change made me take a look at my life and ask myself, was this the life I dreamed about? Was I thriving? Or was I just surviving? Jen is a health and wellness coach; radio show co-host; gym owner and author. She is also a mom of two boysand lives in Croton with her sons and boyfriend John. You can reach her at or send her an email at
Jennifer Zelop

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